Firewall/NAT

Is it enough that I press "Add Library" on the iPhone, see the phone show up in iTunes?  That's not showing up on the wireshark, so I don't know how that happens, I guess not using the two ports I had wireshark looking at.  But iTunes library sharing definitely uses the two ports, and I can "mount" Iko's libraries from other LAN hosts and vice versa.  Looking at just mDNS and DAAP ports, the conversation is busy and looks superficially a lot like a successful Remote/iTunes conversation.

I don't think it's possible to reinstall Bonjour without simply purging iTunes/Quicktime and reinstalling -- I've done that, including all the magic reboots and gone through the registry manually purging, etc.

Will I find the right diagnostic tools if I Google "bonjour browser" and "zeroconf explorer" or can you point me to them?  I'm away from this setup starting now till Sunday evening.

Bonjour is listed separately in add/remove programs in control panel.  It's probably installed as part of itunes.

I found it in C:\Program Files\Bonjour

I can't get hold of an iphone at the moment, but do have an android.  There is quite a bit of documentation on how the discover/registration works at the link below, where they reversed engineered it go get it to work on android

http://dacp.jsharkey.org/

zero conf explorer http://www.stg.com/zeroconf_explorer.html

bonjourbrowser http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bonjour_Browser

I haven't used either.